I got so caught up in weekend fun that I missed a chance to post yesterday to stay on track with the love your body challenge I’m so enjoying. House hunting, doing 14.3, swimming, and seeing some long lost friends filled up my day.
Molly’s challenge yesterday was about how we get what we put in to our bodies back out. She asked us to think about the ways in which our relationship with our bodies is reciprocal–from food to thoughts to training, what we put in, we get out. I like that she includes our thoughts. I know that when I’ve struggled the most have been the times when I’ve let my thoughts go south. When I’ve accomplished the most and felt the best about what I’m doing are the times when I’ve consciously made an effort to think positively about where I’m at and where I’m going. Still, I can get into a negative mindset and downplay where I’m at. Luckily, I have people in my life who call me out when I’m doing that and remind me to get out of my own way so I can get back on track to where I want to go.
Today, Molly talked about intuition and trusting our gut feelings:
“We (women especially) have a very powerful intuition within us that can give us a lot of information about our bodies and even our lives, if only we will listen. Many of us have gotten out of tune with our bodies and don’t appreciate that honesty and intuition, but the more trust and love we have for our bodies, the more they will continue to speak truth to us.”
I am constantly learning to trust my body and its intuition. When I had my eating disorder, I was in a place where my body was the enemy. I was certain, when I started recovery, that my body was out of control and couldn’t be trusted. One of the hardest parts of recovery was starting to eat enough again and trusting that my body would get used to the food without ballooning. Unfortunately, in gaining back recovery weight, I certainly had to deal with feeling like my body was out of control. After restricting and overexercising and essentially killing my metabolism (I ended up on thyroid medicine, waiting years to get my period back, etc.), my body bounced back in the opposite direction to make up for the time it spent so hungry and so tired. I’m learning now that the more I can trust it, the more it will just do what it needs to do. It’s balancing out, I’m starting to feel hunger and fullness cues more than ever before, and I’m even starting to trust my intuition when it comes to things like working out and which workout is “best” for me.
If any of this is speaking to you, I’d send you to Geneen Roth’s books and writings on our bodies and our relationships with food and ourselves. For instance:
“When you believe without knowing you believe that you are damaged at your core, you also believe that you need to hide that damage for anyone to love you. You walk around ashamed of being yourself. You try hard to make up for the way you look, walk, feel. Decisions are agonizing because if you, the person who makes the decision, is damaged, then how can you trust what you decide? You doubt your own impulses so you become masterful at looking outside yourself for comfort. You become an expert at finding experts and programs, at striving and trying hard and then harder to change yourself, but this process only reaffirms what you already believe about yourself — that your needs and choices cannot be trusted, and left to your own devices you are out of control (p.82-83)” ― Geneen Roth, Women Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything
No more! Your body is not out of control. Your body is trustworthy. You are not out of control. You are trustworthy.
Do either of these topics speak to you?
Do you trust your intuition when it comes to food and working out?