Shopping, smiling, sweating, and switching

Hi again! You know I’ve got free time when you get THREE posts from me in one day…

I spent most of the morning at Starbucks plugging away on my random to-dos. So much for freelancing, but yay for crossing lots of my to do list!

After lunch, which I’d packed for the day, I took advantage of the air conditioned mall and did some damage at lululemon. Oops. Don’t you know a girl can never have too much spandex? Believe it or not I never had one of the no limits tanks that every girl who works there seems to own in multiple colours. So this was like a rite of passage for me PLUS I am teaching my butt off these days PLUS I can’t pass up this hot hot pink colour. So I got the cool racerback and the power y tanks in the same shade and I’ll return them if remorse sets in but somehow I don’t think it’s going to!

chard, sprouts, sirloin, and spicy mustard 🙂

I look good in pink, right? Just tell the Visa man that…

I smiled a lot when I got free chocolate from Laura Secord, even if it was probably on the verge of expiry from Valentine’s Day. Om nom nom things that are free taste better and chocolate really never tastes too bad to me!

I ran some more errands/dealt with some appointments and then had myself an early dinner (like 4:30pm grandma/grandpa style) so that I’d have time to digest before heading to the park for bootcamp. It was uber hot so I tried to find a workout that wouldn’t make anyone ACTUALLY pass out, even if it made them feel a little like they might ;).

kale, pork, dried apricots, and avocado

I came up with the following…

Warmup 

5-10 minutes walk/jog (around the park at own pace)

dynamic stretching (arm circles, hip circles, deep breaths, shoulder rolls, etc.)

Workout

1. Lower body circuit = 10 jump squats / 20 hamstring activations (10/side) / 30 reverse lunges with a leg lift (15/side) / 40 step ups / 50 body weight squats  –> repeat 2-3x

10 minutes run/jog

2. Upper body circuit = 5 plank walkouts with a pushup / 10 burpees / 15 decline pushups (feet on park bench) / 20 triceps dips / 25 super mans   –> repeat 2-3x

10 minutes jog/run

3. Core circuit = 45 seconds on/15 seconds off each of extended plank / plank up down / forearm plank / left side plank / right side plank / forearm plank

Cooldown/stretch

…but no one showed up! So I’ll be saving that for tomorrow! I ran into walmart really quickly to grab some batteries and some other random things I needed before I went to the gym. I got my workout on in the air conditioning and it wasn’t so miserable–I guess when you only hit the weight room every once in a while it’s not so boring any more. My workout was:

warm up (squats, lunges, high knees, jumping jacks)

circuit x 3 12 – 15 reps each of barbell squats, deadlifts, bent over rows, medicine ball swings, medicine ball slams, medicine ball pushups (passing the ball so one side is uneven), medicine ball roll ups, oblique twists with the medicine ball, and weighted crunches

spin class! 

So even though I had 0 participants at bootcamp I’m not too upset. It was something ridiculous like 40 million degrees outside anyways and I’m not taking it personally. Aren’t I resilient? I say that cuz in the past I’d take this as a fail–but now I’m taking it in stride instead.

I’m also smiling because this sad face I tried to fake to sum up the whole no participants thing proves that not only is happy healthier for me, it’s also way cuter.

NOT a good look for me!

And I’m smiling because I have a happy belly.

Post-spin, I snarfed some grapes and then started in on this bowl of yogurt with some chocolate when I realized I really wanted something chocolatier and was NOT feeling the yogurt.

So I put it away and whipped up a power ball — kind of like the ones I made earlier this year around Valentine’s day but without any real recipe or guide, just my belly as intuition. Rather than eating fake hershey kisses, why not toss together whole foods and good ingredients and enjoy something I made myself? Walking the walk! 🙂 Warning: if you’re scared of fat, these aren’t for you! But note: you shouldn’t be scared of eating fat! 🙂

In the mix: 1-2 spoonfuls each of ground flaxseed, coconut (unsweetened), maple syrup, cocoa, and cashew butter plus a pinch of salt!

As you can see, after mixing everything together and rolling the result into a ball, I rolled it in a bit more coconut. And tah-dah, a simple and delicious snowball dessert that hit the spot. It was actually pretty big even though this thing looks tiny. I used almost 2 tbsp of cashew butter (I forgot how good it is). It’s been a long time since dinner…

On the agenda for tonight: sleep, sleep, sleep! Tomorrow I have bootcamp, a life coaching session, and a bike ride to look forward to. Looks like I’ll have time to share the playlist from spin tonight as well as maybe get down to work on that freelancing stuff I meant to start today. Wish me luck, and cross your fingers that bootcampers realize the early bird gets the worm!

Where is somewhere in your life that you’ve learned to stop taking things personally?
Do you go to the gym in the summer?
Do you shop at lulu? What’s your fav tank?
What’s your favourite colour to wear?

PS – Steph and I made it onto the London Free Press’s article about yesterday’s yoga event! 🙂 How zen do we look (bottom row, I have the red top on and she had the pink pants that I loved and almost bought today).

 

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WIAW

This post is going to take a different route and kind of sum up some of the stuff I’ve been snarfing lately. And snarf I have…the last stressful week left me eating kind of like a monster. You won’t see the chocolate and random nibbles in these pictures cuz they happened too fast for a photo BUT I am owning up. Last night was a fun night full of junk food (you’ll see) so I’m definitely feeling it and have the motivation to get back on the healthy train. All life is balance and in the past I’d have felt so driven and compulsive about eating “perfectly” to make up for a “bad” week but I’m looking at it with totally different eyes. Acceptance. That makes change possible, right?

Here goes!

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apple oats with raisins and walnuts and yogurt

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rice cakes, almond butter, sprouts, and cranberries

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mini meatloaf and brussel sprouts

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yogurt and oats and coconut 🙂

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oats and cinnamon and banana and yogurt and yummmmm

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apple, kale, carrot, and grape salad with chicken

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swiss chard, brussel sprouts, and sausage 🙂

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pudding shots with baileys and kahlua om nom nom

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oh lord, my coffee table is wild. pudding shots + sour puss gummies = the things you can only justify having as a student therefore needed to be consumed. guac and bacon wrapped figs from my friend who we’ll call martha! and havarti cuz havarti makes a party…

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disclaimer: didn’t eat this all. but did dabble in a burger with peanut butter because how can you not at 2am?

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failed protein pancake…delicious mess when it comes with a banana, honey, peanut butter, and flaxseed on top

It would appear that I love oats and yogurt. That’s the honest truth! Still, posting my eats make me realize I could use some v a r i e t y! I’m craving a bagel…

 

What’s something tasty you ate this week?
What do you eat a lot of?
Have you ever made pudding shots?

Splish splash and some smiles

Oh hey there. Remember how I decided to have a beer last night after calming myself down?

Well I had two.

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…and they were big. And I felt them.

Oh well! I had fun and when I got home some crackers helped soak em up.

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After a good night’s sleep, I did a bit of work this morning (it’s a miracle) after breakfast.

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oats, egg whites, apple, cereal for crunch, brown sugar, and some soy milk

I’m mostly working on my assignments and still haven’t studied. But that’s okay. Each thing is worth not very much at all I realized, which just made me feel even less worried!

Since there were thunderstorms this morning, my riding plans got cancelled. I decided to go to the pool instead. I looked on my daily mile and saw that it’s been a month since the last time I went–oops! In my defence, it was closed for two weeks of that month and I needed a break after all that swimming with my injury.

I had a snack to tide me over, but FYI rice cakes are mostly air so when you have two and feel hungrier, feel free to have three more as you head out the door. Note to self: throw down some almond butter with them next time!

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My swim was pretty good! I really prefer having friends to swim with but lots of people are racing/away/busy this weekend so I was on my own!

I’m not going to lie, I started to think about lunch partway through the swim so when I got home I threw together a quick salad with spinach, more turkey sausage, some goat cheese and sun dried tomatoes. It was delicious but I got a bit of a tummy ache after. Weird!

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Now that I’m starting to feel better, the roads are looking dry and some of my friends are riding so I’m obviously choosing biking over books again and am gonna get my spandex on ASAP. Obviously in my world:

BLOGGING > BIKING (toss up) > BOOKS

And it kind of looks like I’m going to be “winging it” tomorrow, doesn’t it?

Do you like rainy days? What do you do with yourself if you can’t get outside?
What’s your favourite post-beer, bedtime snack? Do you crave salt or sweet or carbs or fat or what?  

(Almost) wordless Wednesday

Today, in a (photographed) nut shell:

  • midnight snack

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  • breakfast attempt 1, with sour cottage cheese = fail

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  • breakfast attempt number 2, with chocolate chips = pure success

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  • my reaction to the rain/bad hair day conditions upon my decision to walk to Brescia today

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  • the products of our lab work today

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  • my PB and pumpkin butter sandwich with sprouts and carrots

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  • my vice (it’s decaf)

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  • my daily mile post for the day:
  • how i spent my afternoon: mother daughter time and pedicures
  • dinner: after just an apple as an afternoon snack, this came at a hangry point (bad idea, folks!) thus there are a few handfuls of unphotographed croutons that were absolutely necessary

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  • how I’m feeling: awesome, loving the positive feedback on last night’s post and really trying to carry all those realizations forward and live them out!

And that’s all. Promise to be back with tons of words soon.

Shopping, school, sunshine, and sweating

This morning I got all ready for school, excited even, and then headed up the hill to Brescia.

I made sure I had a good breakfast (cocoa oats with peanut butter and banana and egg whites) and the sun was shining.

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Turns out my classmates and I were keeners and we only had afternoon class today.

I briefly thought about going for a blissful bike ride and was going to complain about having to teach spin and needing to save legs until I decided not to.

So instead I did what every girl in her right mind would do and went to the mall, where I proceeded to buy myself new shorts that fit (I had a tough time with this yesterday when my summer clothes–which are either a size too big or two too small so are not flattering and not serving me, really) and a bunch of cheap but cute bathing suits that I can mix and match with others in my closet.

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I’m calling it back to school shopping and saying it was just plain necessary. To be honest, I have to say that it was needed. I was upset yesterday about going to the beach because I didn’t have anything to wear that fit comfortably, not because I didn’t want to be seen in shorts or a bathing suit. That’s new for me — even when the smaller stuff fit, I didn’t feel good. The picture from yesterday is one I actually love–and I take that as proof that this whole adjustment thing is actually happening. I honestly just needed clothes that make me feel comfortable. It’s not my body that I was upset over yesterday, it’s the fact that I didn’t have stuff to dress THIS body. And that made me feel wrong. And that’s not okay. Hence, those clothes aren’t serving me. And since I love shopping, buying new ones was easy as pie. I am not trying to brag, just to say that it does get easier to like your body. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops: I like how I look in a bathing suit! Weird tan lines, a little bit of pudge, strange bruises and all!

My eats today were random — an apple during shopping, a salad with carrots/sprouts/cherries/canned salmon for lunch that just didn’t do it for me. Blahhh. In fact it threw my stomach off.

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After school finished, I met up with Andrew for a playground workout. It was kind of awesome to be swinging on monkey bars and playing in the sun, not to mention I haven’t run around like that in a while…

I was finally hungry after this workout so I had a quick dinner of a sandwich before heading to spin! The class was small but it was good nonetheless! Afterwards I went to the grocery store. Bad idea to shop when you’re tired. I think I took twice as long as normal! But if that’s the price I pay for having too much fun to go to the store this weekend then so be it.

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When I got home, I immediately dove into the chocolate. I’m not going to lie, it might be subconscious stress over this summer school stuff/buying bigger clothes/being so happy (that sounds weird but it makes sense to me — though I’m reminding myself happy is where we are supposed to be)/the lack of an afternoon snack catching up with me, but I was kind of a chocolate monster tonight.

I gave up on the plain chocolate and decided to make it into a substantial/kind of more nutritious snack by adding in greek yogurt, cocoa, and coconut.

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Success!

Well, with a home made coffee/cocoa concoction, success. I think I’m done with the chocolate for the night…

One thing I know: this isn’t a reason to beat myself up. It’s not a binge. It’s not proof that I’m out of control. It might be proof that I’m normal, in fact!

Anyways, as you can tell I’m getting delusional. And it’s another school night — so I think I’m heading to bed (if the sugar rush lets me sleep, that is).

How do you deal with chocolate cravings?
Do you like bathing suit shopping?
Have you ever realized you like your body and wanted to shout it from the rooftops?  

PS – I added a new page with a bunch of inspirational cheese. Enjoy!

Life is messy

Today ended up being a bit counter productive, but in the long run, these days are important.

I had an awesome rainy run this morning on the trails. I got lost a little and found myself walking a tree like a tight rope to get back to a path. It happens, and when it does you realize running on the road is oh so boring. I had Garmin issues and I was a soggy rat but I was smiling.

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My lunch was uber early since I worked up an appetite on the trails. Warning: this picture is terrible. But it’s a turkey and cheese sandwich with sprouts and mayo (no surprises here) and an apple.

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After lunch a hurricane hit my apartment, or maybe I tore everything out of my hallway and bedroom closets/drawers?  I worked away on it all afternoon, but I took a break to meet with a prof (about doing my Masters, but that will have to wait until after my nutrition degree is done and who knows what I’ll be passionate about by then, but still cool and I really did enjoy sociology so…I’m keeping my options open! RD with a Masters in Food Sociology? Does that exist? Maybe…or maybe I’ll have to pioneer it) and to have a session with my counsellor, which was a lot about the voices in my head. If that’s not stereotypical of a shrink session, what is? I’m just kidding…but seriously. I wrote down the things that my dominant (the disempowering voice I hear so much) voice (right now) says — things like “you’re meant to be fat. you’re not pretty enough. you’ll always be single. you’re lazy” — and the things my empowering voice says — “your deserve all the good in the world. you’re perfect. you are beautiful. you’re smart.” — and then committed to at least trying to entertain this positive voice more in my life. There’s a good goal if I’ve ever set one!

Anyways, I made some good progress in my apartment as the before/after below will show:

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I also took a break for a snack that I didn’t get a photo of (I was hungry): Kashi organic wheat biscuits and peanut butter. Random but delicious. The ingredients list for the cereal is literally wheat, sugar, and natural flavours. Simple, yummy, easy!

And I whipped up a good dinner with some of the ingredients I know I should eat up before I go away for the week: a spinach salad with acorn squash, turkey, and cranberries (there was maple dressing in the mix, of course, and a few pecans). I think this is the first time I didn’t eat my acorn squash cut in half with a spoon. It was awesome so expect to see me spice it up with squash from now on.

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After spin tonight (the class was awesome — I used almost the same playlist as Friday since I was at a different gym but I changed the order around a bit since hindsight is 20/20), I was hungry!

My snack is more delicious than beautiful: a banana with peanut butter and coconut and chocolate chips. You know there were a few extra licks of peanut butter and I’m not really going to be ashamed to admit that.

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Now it’s time for me to:

a) sleep

b) read blogs

c) work on my summer to do list

d) clean

e) work on my freelance assignment

f) foam roll

I think b) is going to win. Then a), of course (I made sure my bedroom is clean so I have a nice place to crash soon). I’m reminding myself I’ll be able to write from my Grandma’s with my downtime and that my article isn’t due for another week (and I already have sources!) and trying not to let the anxious “you’ll never get it done” voice rule when I have never not gotten it done before…so there!

It’s impossible to believe that tomorrow is May, and I’m going to go ahead and set goals:

  • find my empowering voice — and write down what it says at least once a day
  • act like the person I want to be — i.e. get dressed in clothes that fit now and make me feel good, not in comfy clothes so I can work out or in clothes that are uncomfortably tight just to prove I can; eat things that I picture a healthy, happy version of me eating (not the same thing day after day) in a way that I would do so in front of people (i.e. chew?); take the time to take care of myself and my things (i.e. do my laundry and put it away where it belongs, do my dishes every night so I don’t wake up feeling lazy, paint my nails, etc.)
  • do more workouts with friends and outside (if this is an option, take it!)
  • do one thing every week just for the sake of fun (I played my violin the other day and as rusty as I was, it was bliss)
  • for every magazine I bring in, take two out (I have a problem in the form of hundreds of magazines)
  • make a vision board (I have wanted to do this for so long–who’s in?! for real!)
  • eat dessert with friends at least once a week (or more, but at least!)
  • read more books (before bed, when I’m “bored”, and when I’m killing time–rather than just texting, reading random things online, or worrying that I should be doing something productive)
And now methinks I should call it a night! I’ve got a bunch of cleaning to finish up tomorrow, a bike ride with a friend to look forward to (hoping for sunshine!), and maybe a yoga class if I’m feeling good. Oh, and errands. And packing. And smiling. Busy!

Have your set any goals for yourself lately? Care to share?
Do you hear different voices in your head? Any tips for listening to the “nice” one?
What’s your favourite way to eat squash?

 

Girl talk

Oh gosh. I could literally scream right now out of frustration that I am using a terribly slow/annoying PC (it was mine, my mom took it off my hands when I got my Mac <– Macs are where it’s at!) but I’m just gonna be grateful she’s letting me snag it for the night, cuz clearly you’re all eager for a recap. 😉 Yeah, I’m delusional.

Today, I just went with it. After my slow sit on the bridge, I made it to my doctor’s appointment just barely on time. Besides having to pee like a racehorse, I also was starving. I had nothing to eat but this granola bar that’s been kickin’ it in my glove compartment all winter. Appetizing, no?

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Anyways, it tided me over. There was an Arby’s near my docs and since my mom and I were going to eat each other soon, we went there for a quick sandwich. I had a market fresh one and was oh so satisfied. It’d be a lie if I said I didn’t kind of want curly fries, but I held back cuz these sandwiches are big! And delicious, FYI.

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Now, boys should stop reading, girls should dive right in, it’s about to go to the topics of periods and girly stuff.

I have blogged before about how I haven’t had a regular period in years. Regardless of my weight, training, etc. I had it normally for years and years until my first struggle with ED in high school. I think it’s been 4 years since I’ve seen anything…and back in high school, I had a bone density scan that kind of scared me into my first attempt at recovery. Things are better now, back to normal, and on track. Anyways…

The first question this new doc asked me: “Do you have a sex drive?” Maybe you guys can relate if you’ve struggled with this–the answer is no. I have no problem saying that I used to be BOY CRAZY and now am pretty much not. Yes, crushes. But raging hormones? None around here.

So that was taken care of and she explained to me that I should probably get back on track with my hormones via birth control, even if it’s kind of a bandaid. I asked and she said I’d probably FEEL better if I was in the normal range even if it was coming from birth control. Fair enough. I’d like to feel like a girl again.

My issue in the past with the pill is that I get nasty migraines whenever I take it. I’ve tried a few different brands and even the low dose types increase my migraines (which come on with auras and knock me out entirely) so I was of course scared to hear where she was going with this. But luckily she suggested the ring, which she says probably won’t cause migraines since it won’t require the hormones to be metabolized by my liver. Sounds good to me. I’m in. The only problem is that since I’ve not had a period in ages, I have to do a progesterone “challenge” (i.e. as graphic as it is to clear things out) beforehand. So I’ll suck it up and do it and pray I don’t get migraines.

Now my fear: I’ll be boy crazy, moody, etc. Nah, I’m going to go with this: I have my thyroid largely under control now (I think) and this is just another step towards balancing everything out. The doc explained that lots of athletes, even girls like me who are at healthy weights, don’t have enough body fat to make the hormones. So I told her about my various weights and still not having it and she said exercise and training and having a high muscle mass will do it. And I believe her. She said I’d have to stop training and gain fat to get it back — as an extreme — and that that is NOT necessary. Phew. I don’t mind the gaining fat part, so if I want to get pregnant years from now, bring it on, but I do mind the not training, the not knowing if it’s worth it, etc. I just want to feel good. So like I said, this is refreshing. I am en route to feeling my best in years, and I am choosing to really believe that!

And end girly talk.

After the appointment, my mom and I got her some groceries at WalMart and then came back. I did an awesome power yoga class tonight and then made a quick easy dinner with the rotisserie chicken my mom bought for her and her boyfriend. Then I stole the computer and now here I am! I am going to keep you updated on those girly issues because I know a lot of us go through this and wonder if there is a problem/solution/if we should be worried and doing something!

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I’ll see you all soon — I have a few posts up my sleeve just waiting to be written!

Positivi-tea and packing

Hey! Just checking in for a quick post before I head to Sunday Funday and then to Sarnia. I’m never in the mood to pack, so consider this my procrastination…

This morning I went to the gym and rode the spin bike for about an hour. Then I headed for yoga and got my zen on in a sweaty awesome power class. Seriously, awesome!

In between I snarfed a clif bar to keep my tummy from rumbling.

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Afterwards, I was sweaty and hungry again. After a few bites of yogurt I realized I wanted a meal so when I met up with my friend Steph, who was in my program and works in fitness/is doing her masters in kin now, for coffee, we moved our chit chat to Cafe One, where I had a visually unappealing but absolutely wonderful caesar salad with steak (it’s going unphotographed).

We also had tea! I made a pact with Bee over at Bee Goes Bananas that I would give up buying decaf coffees (cuz what’s the point?) in favour of some tasty teas. I started this pact off with a purchase from David’s Tea: the Sweet Indulgence gift box. A gift for me? Yupp. It comes with 12 dessert teas and I am oh so excited to drink them—especially the ones I already love!

Anyways, so I made good on the pact and had tea! And a heart to heart, which got me so excited. It’s nice to catch up when I’m feeling so positive about things and when Steph is likeminded, goal driven, and confident. Seriously, it’s rare to hear someone speak with such self awareness/certainty and I loved it! I hope some of that rubs off on me, and I hope she reads this ;)!

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And now it’s time to do that packing I put off. I’m just heading home for a day to go back to the doc’s and to see my mom, who’s finally back from Texas tonight! Yay. I’m going to try to get to a spin class and maybe out for a run tomorrow, though I’m not looking forward to this week’s weather forecast one bit. The whole North winds at 55kmh and snow thing in tomorrow’s forecast makes the decision of whether or not to pack my bike to take home an easy one!

W T heck mother nature?!

Oh well!

Happy Sunday.

What did you do this weekend?
Do you drink tea or coffee? Or both? 

I love road trips and reunions

I think I could easily have written a post on how to have a perfect day.

Start with lots of lazy blogging and coffee.

Move on to a run with good company (in my case Ellen, who is always so positive and leaves me feeling happy as a clam!).  Bonus points if it’s sunny out and you can run in a tank top.

Make your lunch delicious–fresh bread, anyone?

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Toss in some tasty snacks — an apple, a granola bar, a yogurt mess — and then hit the road.

Connect with old friends and make a few new.

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Eat something delicious at a restaurant everyone should try.

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And do something cool — make crafts! Realize you might not be artsy, but that doesn’t mean you’re not crafty.

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If you can, also get to spend time with one of the most wonderful people you’ve met–here comes a little love letter to Lisa, who literally has been there for me through thick and thin.

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Whether I need someone to call, eat puppy chow with, go for a run with, sit around and “reflect” with, or laugh my butt off with, she’s a go to kind of girl.

This seems appropriate, given the Anais Nin theme I started with my mug…

It also seems appropriate to be asleep right now!

When’s the last time you connected with an old friend?
Do you like making crafts? What’s your favourite?


How much is too much?

So, looking back on my eats, one thing stands out. I am loving the high fibre cereal right now.

Last night, post-spin, I had yogurt with All Bran Buds.

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This morning, I combo’d more of the buds with Kashi and berries and soy milk for breakfast before swim.

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I had a snack that was not cereal–an apple–and after swim I ate a big salad with turkey, sweet potato, maple vinaigrette, dried cranberries, and pecans.

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I also did some core work and stretching with my swim because I’m nervous about my back of the knee pain. I thought it was in my hamstring, but now I think it’s in my calf. And I had calf pain last year similarly, so I know I can get through it. Nonetheless, blasting these songs is necessary:

And I’m moving on. I had a snack of more All Bran (but the original kind, so there’s the variety I know is important) with you guessed it, yogurt when I got home from texting and reading blogs at Starbucks  studying. Tomorrow’s exam is worth 20%, is open book, and is a Writing exam. I’m not sure what to expect because I’ve never had one of these before! So I’m studying a bit, staying calm, and trying not to worry (recall epiphany?).

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I’m just about to gear up for a ride. I hope my calf cooperates but I’m ready to do whatever I need to to take care of this/nip it in the bud! I think there’s a massage in my future and I’ll be stretching extra with all my spare time, rather than compulsively googling “back of the knee pain” etc. etc. and freaking myself out. Tonight I’m planning on seeing some friends, perhaps eating some fro yo, and on making sure I don’t eat All Bran for dinner! My fibre intake for the day is already over 50 grams, which is double the recommended intake. Yes, I am regular, thank you very much!

PS On my walk home today, I had time to slow down and notice some pretty flowers. Sometimes I get so in the zone and have my headphones on and my mind racing, but today I tried to walk and enjoy it! And tah-dah, look what stared me in the face!

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Do you ever get in food ruts?
Do you know if you eat enough fibre?